Fact - 99% of males without a partner looking to hook up with swingers are doomed to complete failure!
If you as a single male get invited to attend a lifestyle party, then clearly you are part of the lucky 1%.
How can we as single men get even luckier?We can do this by following a few simple steps and the application of a measure of common sense. First thing to understand is that we (single males) are not swingers! You might want to be a swinger, you may even convince yourself that you indeed are but unless you have a partner you are only fooling yourself. Take the view that we are an honored guest (because clearly we are, think about it; a married man openly and willingly allowing us the pleasure to make love to his wife while he watches.) and behave accordingly.
Keep in mind that you are in contact with a couple. Asking if the female will meet you alone is the surest way to get an unsavory reputation, not just with the couple in question but with all those in their circle. Swingers like everyone else, love to exchange information for good and bad. You would be amazed at how quickly names of undesirables circulate.
Be honest. Remember we are talking about hooking up for face to face sex. If you are making claims that you are unable to substantiate in the flesh then the couple WILL walk away. You have not just wasted their time but you have wasted your own and effectively ruined your future prospects.
There is no reason to lie to a couple about ANYTHING, even if you are married (granted there may be significantly less couples wanting to play with you, but at least everything is up front and adults are free to choose). These people are smart and may let you get by with it for awhile, but eventually will "let you go". REMEMBER: Many of these couples exchange information and especially when someone is tagged "untrustworthy" they make sure they pass the info along.
MARRIED MEN LOOKING FOR AN EASY LAY
Forget it; it ain't gonna happen for long. Swinging isn't for you. Of course you know better right? OK, let me explain it to you. Swinging is a free and open lifestyle based on honesty and a guilt-free relationship. Sneaking away while your wife is at work for some "discreet sex" is the complete opposite of what swinging is about. You try to force your way into a lifestyle where you are clearly not welcome by using the same lies and deception you practice on your wife. It causes nothing but resentment. You expose swingers to personal and physical attacks by your wife, lie about your marital status, make it all but impossible for the REAL singles to join swingers, waste so much time with your lies and deceptions and cause more trouble than any other group of people.
Of course you are thinking "I will just lie and claim to be single"; after all you are lying to your wife so why not lie to others. Wise up, swingers have had more than enough and are very aware of every cheap little trick you can think of. Any experienced swinger can spot a married cheat on the horizon with ease.
Off-Premise Rules For Select Single Gentleman To Live By To Have A Great Time
"Select" means that you must be clean, polite, well dressed and well mannered. In short, you must be a classy guy.
Be a gentleman AND a classy guy. Just because a woman likes sex, doesn't mean she appreciates vulgar language or suggestive remarks. Good manners and social skills are more important here than anywhere else.
Dress nice, like you're going on a date. Because you ARE going on a date! When you know you will be having an intimate encounter with your mate, you take extra special care in your daily hygiene routine, right? Well multiply that ten times for this lifestyle. On a first date you spend extra time brushing & flossing your teeth, showering, shaving, doing your hair and putting on your best cologne. Treat this like a first date, get extra cleaned up and dress to impress! Leave your torn or baggy jeans or shorts and T-shirt, tank top and baseball cap at home, you're not in high school any more so don't dress like it.
The strictly enforced dress code is:
No Sweat or Warm Up Suits
No Printed T-Shirts
No Tank Tops
No Torn and Tattered Jeans
No Torn or baggy excessively worn clothing
No baseball caps
No old sneakers
Dress to impress... Because isn't that what you do when you go on a date?! REMEMBER if in doubt about what to wear, it is always better to over dress rather than under dress. First impressions are extremely important because we never get a second chance to make a first impression!
Don't assume that just because you talk or dance with someone that they want to have sex with you. And, don't get too aggressive on the dance floor or anyplace else within the club, etc. unless you get the clear message that it's OK. If you get that message, go with it, just don't go overboard. You should be asking, "Is this okay"?
Introduce yourself to both the husband and his wife. Never wait until The husband leaves his wife and sneak up to meet her without him present, or wait to ambush her as she heads to the ladies room.
If you want a 100% sure thing then go to a whorehouse or call an escort. This is a social club and the ladies here are upscale wives and girlfriends and above all, they are ladies, not escorts. Treat them like ladies.
Don't ignore the husband. No matter how much his wife likes you, if the husband doesn't like you, you're not getting anywhere with her. This doesn't mean you need to spend all night talking with him, but introduce yourself and be cordial and play it by ear.
If someone tells you "NO" that's all there is to it. It's not open for discussion! Don't ask them, "why not?" or "are you sure, I'm the greatest lover in the world?" They are not interested in you joining them no matter how great of a lover or how big your dick might be!
All in all, it's real simple; be a gentleman, be classy, be friendly, and treat people well. Everyone has a much better evening if the ladies have a fun time, and if they do, then you've got a great chance at having a really fun time with them.
Appropriate Behavior For Joining A Couple
A true gentleman AND classy guy in the swinging lifestyle is non-threatening to the male spouse's virility...He's happy to be sharing in the encounter and doesn't try to monopolize it... He knows his place in the bedroom and out...He is also a friend of BOTH spouses, yet slightly closer to the male.
In A Nutshell... Be A Classy Guy!
1) Always be polite.
2) Never assume.
3) Ask permission before touching.
4) 'No' means 'No'. Accept it gracefully. No one pleases everybody. And never think that you know more about what she wants than she does! If she or her husband says "No", then that's exactly what they mean, don't question "Why". It's not open for discussion. If they have to tell you twice, then you are no longer welcome and you will be asked to leave.
5) If you're unsure about proper procedures or what's allowed, Ask!
6) Most people in the club have a partner; include them in your conversation when appropriate.
7) Mind your manners. Be on your very best behavior.
8) Pay attention to nonverbal signals, both positive and negative. Body language speaks much louder than actual words. Act accordingly!
9) When talking to other people in the club that you are interested in, make sure you understand their personal rules and boundaries. Every one is different.
10) Admission to the club DOES NOT guarantee that you will have sex, but only that you will be admitted to the club. No one owes you anything and you shouldn't expect anything from anyone.
11) If you have a problem with someone at the club, PLEASE tell the management and let them handle it, not you. Never create or contribute to a "scene".
12) If you're new and have additional questions about the club or the lifestyle, ask to speak to one of the regular member couples. They will be happy to answer any questions you might have. It's also a great way to start a conversation!
13) Class and style will get you much further than pushiness, arrogance or macho crass behavior.
14) Be aware of how much you drink. No one is attracted to or impressed with, or wants to be around a drunk. This is a social club, NOT a drinking club.
If you follow these guidelines, you should have a great time and make lots of new sexy friends!